How Coaching Changed My Life
Sometimes we learn best from the path of others. Here, I’m sharing some wisdom nuggets that you may find helpful.
I got introduced to Life Coaching in my mid-twenties, back in 2012. At the time I felt very anxious, I was unhappy in my job, worried on a daily basis about ‘small things’ that seemed to dominate my mind space. To top it all up my skin was flaring up massively: I had really bad eczema, which didn’t help my current situation of feeling unwell in my skin.
So, I decided to reach out to my coach who has guided me on my journey, and I have never looked back since. In fact, I was so fascinated by the tangible tools available to me, realising how powerful little tweaks can impact my day to day life, that I decided to live my life more purposefully and became a Life Coach myself.
Today I would like to share with you why having sessions with my Life Coach has helped me so much in my day to day life.
1. Your Are In Charge
Instead of feeling like a victim, I learnt to be in charge and take things into my hands. To be aware of the words that you use on a daily basis impact your thoughts, emotions and therefore your actions. I got introduced to affirmations, that I now use on a daily basis. You might wonder what they are? And why do they work? One of my favourite positive affirmations are: “I am healing every day, and I love myself.” Because your unconscious mind cannot tell the difference between what is real, and what isn’t, you are gently and effectively retraining your head brain to think positively again. The more you do it, the easier it will get.
2. You Are Not Your Behavior
This one was big for me. It is not because you have until now always been called a ‘half glass empty person’ that it needs to stay that way for the rest of your life. You can change that. You have the choice. The choice to have a choice. To feel more positive, to feel less worried. I was labelled as a worrier for a very long time, because I was always worrying about everything, I was even worrying that I wasn’t worried sometimes… So, you really can un-do whatever current behaviour you are ‘doing’ and replace it with a more resourceful one. If I can do it, you can as well. Because what is personal is universal.
3. It Is Ok Not To Be Ok
And the more you associate with the negative emotions, the faster the healing will be. What I mean with ‘associate’ is to have the courage to connect and feel the hurt you are currently experiencing. Opening up and feeling vulnerable might come across as scary first, because you might not have shared anything personal with anyone before. And you might worry what you will discover during the session. And that too is normal. Your coach will hold a safe space for you so that you can open up and share what is going on for you. You will be able to learn from the situation and gain wisdom that already resides inside of you. The more you shove your emotions under the carpet, the bigger the bump will get. Shame wants you to do just that, because that is how it grows, making you feel even more anxious. It is up to you to decide. It takes courage to feel vulnerable, and it is so worth it once you know that you can fully trust the person sitting next to you. You hold the key of your healing in your hands.
4. What Others Think of You is None of Your Business
Hearing this motto for the first time from my coach helped me to detach myself from what other people think of what I did and didn’t do. People’s opinions about you are marked by their own experiences and journey, which is probably very different to yours. And it is true. Not everyone will understand your decisions, your actions. And that is totally okay. I learnt and embodied the understanding that you can only understand others by stepping into their shoes. And coaching allows you to do just that, should you want to gain a different perspective of yours. To be able to switch from one perspective to another will empower you. It will help you rise above the current tricky situation that you are in and give you some wisdom that you can apply to yourself.
5. Having the Courage to Say No
To connect with what is important to me, what defines me and to be aware of my own values was also huge for me during my coaching sessions. I had forgotten what they were, because I was putting other people first, being an excellent people pleaser. Creating firm boundaries true to you will allow you to show up more authentically in your life. You will feel more empowered, and you can learn to say no gracefully. This process and understanding have enhanced the relationships with my family and people in my life significantly because they were also able to see and witness the real me. And the people who really love you will respect and understand your point of view. Expressing your true self and the fact of no longer making excuses for other people is very empowering. Because you are important, you are unique and you matter.
Wisdom Nuggets – In Conclusion
In a nutshell, coaching has allowed me to step away from the role of feeling like a victim on a daily basis. I am now able to adopt a ‘solution focused’ mindset which allows me to feel empowered and to gain different perspectives from ‘sticky’ situations. Reconnecting with my values, embodying that what others think and say about me is none of my business, and that it is ok to share my vulnerable side with a person of trust in order for me to grow, has allowed me to be the person I am today : happy in my skin, more relaxed, less worried, less anxious, more focused and determined, and living life in accordance to my values.
If this has spiked your curiosity and you fancy jumping on a discovery call with me, please do so. I would love to hear from you.
Questions? Ready to Get Started?
Do you have questions for Emilie? You can find ways to connect with her on her Contact page.